Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing...When You're Over 60?

If you have a Millennial or Gen Z daughter, you may already be familiar with a trend lighting up TikTok and Instagram: single and stylish women declaring freedom from the relationship rat race. The spark came from a recent British Vogue article by Chanté Thomas boldly titled, “Is Having a Boyfriend Embarrassing Now?” The answer, according to thousands of gleeful comments and videos, seems to be yes—at least for a growing group of young women tired of being defined by their relationship status.

The women are using their social media feeds to declare that they are fed up with ghosting, endless swiping, and “soft-launching” boyfriends who disappear before the next algorithm refresh. They’re also weary of watching others perform picture-perfect relationships online—those “Instagram official” posts, orchestrated engagements, and weddings with flower walls that cost more than a college education. Instead, they’re joyfully embracing singlehood as the new status symbol: emotionally independent, financially secure, and romantically unbothered.

From British Vogue to Boomer Wisdom: The Boyfriend Backlash Spans Generations

All this anti-boyfriend energy has me thinking about what it means to be single post 60. After all, Boomer women grew up in a world where having a man wasn’t just expected—it was the whole goal. Our fairy tales all featured happy endings that hinged on finding “the one.” Cinderella had Prince Charming, Barbie had Ken, and Jackie had JFK. The message was clear: a man completed the picture.

But then decades passed and real life happened.

Many of us married, divorced, remarried, or became widowed. We’ve built careers, raised families, and held entire households together. And like our Millennial and Gen Z sisters, we’ve also had to navigate the bumpy road of online dating where endless texting and video chats have replaced the excitement of meeting a nice guy at your college mixer.

Single, Stylish, and 60+: Why More Women Are Thriving on Their Own

So, maybe we have more in common with the twenty- and thirty-something women than we think. Are women in their 60s and beyond also over the whole boyfriend thing?

The answer is nuanced. A growing number of women are perfectly content staying single. The U.S. Census Bureau reports that women over 60 represent one of the fastest-growing single demographics, driven by longer life spans, financial independence, and a desire for autonomy.

Many say they’ve finally reached a stage of life where they don’t need a partner to feel complete—they just need purpose, connection, and maybe someone to laugh with over a good glass of Pinot.

Others have realized that, after decades of commitments, caregiving, and compromise, later life is the perfect time to redefine relationships on their own terms. Some are happily unattached and thriving; others enjoy romance without the rulebook.

Either way, this new era of love after 60 is less about labels and more about laughter, freedom, and self-confidence — because if it’s “embarrassing” to have a boyfriend, maybe we’ve finally earned the right to be delightfully unbothered.

Love After 60: Rewriting the Rules—and Singing a New Song

I can’t help but think about the final scene played out by the character Carrie Bradshaw in the finale of the “And Just Like That…” series on HBO Max. Carrie’s husband Big has died, her efforts to revive her old relationship with Aiden have failed, as have several short-lived romances that never felt right. Carrie is alone, in her beautifully decorated Gramercy Park townhouse, having just left Thanksgiving dinner with her friends, and she’s enjoying a solo slice of pumpkin pie—while dancing in a red tutu to the classic Barry White tune, “You’re The First, The Last, My Everything.”

For a character whose entire storyline was about finding a man, Carrie finally learns the most important lesson of all. Single or not, the most important relationship of your life is the one you have with yourself.

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HELL YEAH!

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LET’S TALK ABOUT IT:

Need or want? Which describes how you feel about having a significant other in later life?